I like cake with my sodomy, thank you.

I recently paid $16 motherfricken dollars to see Capote in the theater. Worth every penny. Oh sure, my hand shriveled up like the Wicked Witch of the West’s foot when pimpleclerk let me know that the $10 I was clutching doesn’t even cover matinee, much less evening shows. But ultimately I squeezed a few more drops of life’s blood out of my wallet.

I wanna see what their profit margin is. Capote grossed “just under $1.43 million,” yet I have to pay the price of a week’s worth of food in Nairobi to get 2 fleeting hours of entertainment?

Sorry, MPAA, you can’t cry piracy while simultaneously butt-pirating us at the cineplex. We demand lube. Or at least a generous student discount.

The film was a wonderful portrait of exquisite psychological torment, the likes of which I can get for free at home.

Who’s up for a Philip Seymour Hoffman marathon?

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